I've learned that...

I've learned that all teachers have secret powers. - age 11

I've learned that telling a lie is worse than telling the bad truth. - age 11

I've learned that you never judge a book by its movie. - age 11

I've learned always choose good partners for school projects or you might end up doing most of the work. - age 10

I've learned that if you want to have a sleepover you are more likely to have one if you ask your dad rather than your mom. - age 10

I've learned typing on Type to Learn doesn't improve your typing, but typing up short stories you wrote yourself does. - age 10

I've learned that it is better to stay in at recess to get your work done than get farther and farther behind. - age 10

I've learned never to play with CRAZY glue. - age 10

I've learned not to cook half of a grape in the microwave. - age 10

I've learned that it's okay to get in trouble on Tuesdays because the principal is at a meeting. - age 10

I've learned that you should never test how far a slingshot gun goes when you are near a lot of houses. - age 10

I've learned never to sit on a wet bicycle seat. - age 10

I've learned you should never take without giving. - age 10

I've learned you should never give yourself a haircut. - age 10

I've learned that you should never yell at your mom when she's pregnant. - age 10

I've learned that you should never let your dad buy you clothes. - age 10

I've learned that you should never tell your parents who you have a crush on. - age 10

I've learned that when your parents are mad it is best to not talk to them. - age 10

I've learned that you can never have too much adventure. - age 10

I've learned that you shouldn't try to open a coconut with a folding Swiss army knife. - age 11

I've learned not to offer a hungry hamster invisible food. - age 11

I've learned that you should never show your stuffed animals to a dog. - age 10

I've learned to never paint faces on my dad when he's asleep. - age 10

I've learned never to touch your tongue to an ice sculpture. - age 10

I've learned that I am growing up too fast. - age 10

I've learned not to hiss like a cat at a stray dog. - age 11

I've learned that you can never outwit your dog. - age 10

I've learned that you should never put fertilizer on your head. - age 10

I've learned to never give your baby brother a permanent marker. - age 10

I've learned never to make my mom watch "Whose Line Is It Anyway?", or else she'll laugh so hard that she'll snort like a pig. - age 10

I've learned that when you are sad, all you want to do is be alone and talk to yourself, not others. - age 11

I've learned that no matter how old I am, I still ask my mom how to do things. - age 42